Daily Star's agony aunt Jane O'Gorman is available daily to help readers with their problems, offering straightforward advice on issues ranging from bedroom confessions to self-confidence and drug use. Readers can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP, or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Jane cannot respond to individual letters, and not all problems will be published.
Reader Struggles with Manipulative Friend
A reader wrote to Jane about a longtime friend who is 'sneaky, calculating and mean.' The friend avoids paying her share on nights out, uses men for sex, and shares intimate details. She slept with the reader's brother last year and humiliated him with post-coital put-downs. Recently, she slept with her newly married ex-boss and bragged about him being a 'sexual let down' on social media, leaving his new wife in pieces.
The friend also argues for discounts in restaurants, gossips about those who care for her, and 'forgot' her credit card on a trip to Barcelona, now owing £400 with no mention of repayment. The reader's sister refuses to go out with her again.
Jane's Advice: Confront and Cut Ties
Jane says the friend knows exactly what she's doing and didn't forget the credit card by accident. She advises the reader to list every penny owed and present the bill, shaming her and making clear the game is up. While the money may not be recovered, Jane stresses the reader cannot stick with someone with so little regard for her. She urges the reader to dump the friend before she steals more energy and cash, noting long acquaintance doesn't entitle her to loyalty.
Second Reader Faces Controlling Husband
Another reader described her husband as bossy at work and at home. He questions her spending, dictates who can visit, and talks to their teenage kids (15 and 17) like a sergeant major, causing them to hate him. His behavior worsens as he climbs the corporate ladder. He recently banned her mum from the house.
Jane advises telling him to leave his attitude at work and be a proper husband and dad, warning he's in danger of losing respect and potentially the marriage. She suggests he may be under pressure but needs to talk about it, and asks what his problem is with the mum and why he can't treat kids kindly. She recommends he speaks to his GP about stress levels, and advises the reader to promise support but make clear she won't be crushed.
