A mother of three young children has written to Coleen Nolan for advice, saying her husband's dedication to his own business is making her feel like a single parent. The woman, who has children aged between two and six, says she is 'knackered all the time' and complains that her husband is 'at work every hour of the day'.
Business success, but no balance
The reader explains that while she was patient during the business's startup phase, it is now established and doing well, yet her husband remains absent. When she raises the issue, his responses are variations of 'the buck stops with me', 'people rely on me', 'I have to be there' and 'I'm doing it for us'.
She admits she thinks he simply prefers being at work to dealing with the children, and notes that her parents live too far away to help, while her mother-in-law's health prevents her from coping with the kids.
Coleen's advice: schedule family time
In her response, Coleen says the husband may be 'scoring top marks at being a great team member at work' but is 'failing at home'. She suggests the couple create a loose schedule for him to be more involved at home, with 'wiggle room if things go nuts at work'.
Coleen also advises him to switch off his phone when at home and delegate more to his next-in-command. She warns that being absent so often could damage the family and couple relationship, and reminds him he is 'in danger of missing out on so much and might regret that in years to come'.
Finding a break
As a practical step, Coleen recommends finding a good babysitter and having nights out, noting that things get easier as children get older and childcare options increase.
