A mother is struggling to tell her 13-year-old daughter about her grandfather's terminal cancer diagnosis. The girl, who has dyslexia and ADHD, is extremely close to her grandfather and has already faced bullying at school.
A Difficult Conversation
The mother, writing to agony aunt Coleen Nolan, says she has been putting off the conversation because she's worried how it will affect her daughter, especially at school. She describes her father as the one person her daughter can relate to, saying he's 'brilliant' with her and always finds activities for them to do together.
Coleen advises being open and honest, noting that teenagers will often search for answers online. She suggests that hearing the news from a parent allows for accurate information and support.
Practical Advice
Coleen recommends encouraging the daughter to talk to others about her grandfather and letting the school know so they can offer support or counselling. She also shares a personal story about her own daughter's regret at not attending a funeral, advising against shutting the girl out from spending time with her grandfather or saying goodbye.
She acknowledges there's no way around the heartbreak but stresses that it does become easier to deal with, and it's important to let her know it's OK to cry and express her feelings. Coleen also points to online guidance from cancer charities like Cancer Research UK and Macmillan.
