New Hearts midfielder Tom Renaud has revealed he suffered from depression as a young professional in France, a period that almost drove him out of football. The 25-year-old, who joined the Edinburgh club from FC Versailles this summer, opened up about his struggles in an interview with French outlet Sofoot.
Early Career Struggles at Lorient
Renaud described how his career derailed after turning professional with Lorient, where he played alongside Sunderland's Enzo Le Fee and under current Black Cats boss Regis Le Bris, then academy director. He said being frozen out by a coach sent him into a downward spiral he now recognises as depression.
“Everything was going according to plan for me. It was the normal process,” Renaud said. “It was when I stepped into the professional world that something happened and I realised there was a huge gap between academy football and professional football. Nobody had prepared me for that.”
He added: “The coach [Christophe Pélissier] made a mistake over something that happened off the pitch, mixed everything together and made me out to be a lazy good-for-nothing. He never tried to understand what had happened. Rather than helping me, he told people that I didn’t like football, which wasn’t true at all.”
Weight Gain and Turning to Family
Renaud also admitted to developing eating issues during this period. “When I finished at Lorient I weighed 73 kilos. At Cholet, I was over 86 kilos,” he said. “Because I had put on weight, I was a bit ashamed of my body and I found it difficult to take my shirt off in the dressing room.”
The midfielder eventually called his aunt, a nurse, for help. “One day I was so far down that I called my aunt, who’s a nurse,” he said. “That was when she said to me: ‘My boy, you’re depressed.’ Eventually I understood that I needed to speak to a professional. It shouldn’t be a taboo subject.”
Almost Quitting and Rediscovering Football
Renaud revealed he nearly quit the game altogether before speaking to a psychologist. “At that point, I had put football to one side. I had even told my parents I wanted to quit,” he said. “Mentally, it helped me enormously and it helped me rediscover my love of football, even though that took a year or two.”
He now works with a mental-performance coach and said his short-term dream is to win the league with Hearts, adding: “I’m very proud of the footballer and the man I’ve become.” Renaud is currently facing a spell on the sidelines after being stretchered off during the Conference League playoff victory over Rapid Vienna, and hopes to be fit for the visit of Monaco.
