Daily Star's agony aunt Jane O'Gorman is on hand every day to tackle readers' issues with straight-talking but sound advice. From bedroom confessions to self-confidence issues and drug use, she has helped thousands of readers over the years and isn't slowing down.
Readers seeking help can write to Just Jane, Daily Star, One Canada Square, London, E145AP or email jane.ogorman@reachplc.com. Jane cannot respond to individual letters, and not all problems will be published.
Public Sex Fetish Raises Legal Concerns
One reader wrote about her boyfriend who enjoys sex in public places, taking risks in underground car parks and public toilets. He gets turned on when he hears someone walking nearby and prefers the experience to be as grotty as possible, yawning at suggestions of romantic dates or an early night in bed.
Over the summer, the couple travelled to Turkey and Tenerife, and had a fumble on every flight and beach. The reader lives in fear of being caught, but her boyfriend insists it's all 'just a bit of fun'.
Jane says it's not a bit of fun if the boyfriend is coercing and the reader doesn't enjoy it. She reminds that under Section 71 of the Sexual Offences Act 2003, it is an offence to indulge in sexual activity in a lavatory to which the public has access. If caught, both could face a fine and/or up to six months in prison.
Jane advises the reader to stand up for herself, tell him she's done, and walk away. 'This guy is no good for you and sounds as if he'd benefit from professional counselling.'
Stingy Partner Sparks Gift Row
Another reader complained that her boyfriend doesn't buy birthday or Christmas presents, arguing modern life is too commercial. Last Christmas, she bought him a watch and cashmere sweater, but he tossed a tangerine from his mother's fruit bowl at her, jeering 'Here'.
She recently celebrated her 25th birthday with no card from him. Her sister calls him stingy, not principled, as he spends money on himself. He's about to turn 30, and she wonders if she should pull the same stunt.
Jane suspects the man will continue to frustrate and annoy her the longer they stay together. She advises weighing up if he is generous and kind in other ways, and whether he would put her interests second in a serious situation. 'I think it might be time to re-access this whole relationship.'
New Housemate Refuses to Share
A third reader moved in with her newish boyfriend, but he doesn't like to share. He deliberately buys food he knows she doesn't like, so he can have it all to himself, and does the same with booze and basics like toothpaste.
Jane acknowledges teething problems in a new setup, but says the petty guy needs to hear that she's not out to pinch his sweets. She advises establishing middle ground on meals and funding, setting up a joint account for food, utilities, and basics, into which both put an equal amount each month.
