About 18 months after his fiancé Jamie passed away in 2024, Anthony Nocera decided he was lonely and horny, so he put himself out there on the apps. He had placed Jamie's ashes on the TV cabinet in the living room, putting him in the centre of the house, which made dating hard.
A Hook-Up's Reaction to the Urn
One night, a guy came over for a hook-up and kept fixating on the urn. "So … He's dead?" he asked. "I hope so," Anthony said. "Otherwise the urn was a mistake." The guy didn't get the joke and called Anthony brave. Anthony reflected that being a "brave widow" makes you desirable in theory, not practice.
When the urn didn't ward off potential suitors, his cat Freyja did. She appointed herself his fluffy protector in Jamie's absence, camouflaging herself on the charcoal-grey carpet outside his bedroom each night to keep watch. When a visitor did come, she would spring into hostile action, yowling and hissing at a semi-closeted doctor who tried to pick her up, and clawing the shin of a guy who accidentally kicked her.
Billy's Arrival and a Special Moment
After months of self-imposed celibacy, a guy named Billy, with gorgeous green eyes and a crooked smile, messaged Anthony. Billy asked about his day, and Anthony sent a picture of a painting he'd hung up. Billy asked to see it in person, and Anthony said yes. When Billy arrived, he spotted Freyja and, before saying hello to Anthony, crouched down and said: "Hello Miss!" Freyja waddled over and flopped on her back, presenting her belly for patting while she purred. When Anthony told him her name, Billy said: "Oh Miss Freyja!" Then he kissed Anthony.
Billy didn't mention the urn until hours later, and when Anthony told him the story of him and Jamie, Billy said: "Sounds like a great guy." Freyja wove between their feet and vibrated her tail when Billy kissed Anthony goodbye, then waited by the door with a melancholic meow.
A Moment of Love and Looking Forward
Late one night, they walked past a club having a 90s party. Madonna's Ray of Light, Jamie's favourite song, blared out onto the street. Billy turned to Anthony, smiling, and said: "Jamie's here, isn't that nice?" and squeezed his hand. Anthony felt flutters all through his body and fell head over heels in love in a way he never thought he would again.
Anthony reflected that it takes a special person, like Billy, to look at the shoes of a past lover and not try to fill them; to leave them be and plant their own next to the ones left behind. Billy is funny, patient and kind, and smarter and more handsome than he realises. Anthony finds it hard to think in terms of "forever" now, but he looks at Billy and thinks he'd be happy doing this day by day, for a long time – with Miss Freyja by their side and Jamie watching over them all.
