Gemma Collins has candidly shared the struggles of trying to conceive, admitting in a new television show that the process is currently not going to plan. The former TOWIE star, now 45, will document the highs and lows of her fertility journey in a programme set to air on Sky TV this September.
“I’m trying to have a baby, but let’s see. It’s not going very well at the minute,” Collins revealed. “But you can watch a show all about that. It comes out in September on Sky TV.”
Fertility Journey and Perimenopause
Collins has previously expressed being “desperate” to become a mother and has even chosen a name for her future child: Blossom. The upcoming show may also delve into her experience with perimenopause, which she has described as “sucks” due to its impact on her memory. “I can’t remember nothing, it’s bizarre,” she told fans on Instagram. “It’s like an out-of-body experience, my mind is normally very sharp.”
Despite the challenges, Collins counts her blessings, including her relationship with fiancé Rami Hawash, their family life with his son Tristan, and their multiple animals at their Essex home. “I’m very grateful,” she said.
Family Health Concerns
Recently, Collins has been preoccupied with her mother Joan’s health. Joan, 70, was hospitalised with pneumonia in early June for the second time in six months. “My mum’s been very unwell,” Collins confirmed. “She got pneumonia. My parents live in my house now and she’s getting there every day. She lost her mobility. We’re trying to get her walking again. My life recently hasn’t been about me.”
The caregiving has been all-consuming, leading Collins to deprioritise self-care. Takeaways have replaced home-cooked meals, leaving her feeling subpar. “I’ve been helping Mum a lot and you do eat takeaways and go, ‘I need to get back on track, just to get myself feeling good again,’” she said. “We wouldn’t be human if we didn’t have those moments.”
Body Image and Self-Harm History
Collins has been open about her lifelong struggle with weight and body image. She revealed she has turned down significant financial offers to lose weight. “So many people have said to me, ‘We’ll pay you to lose weight,’” she said. “I thought, ‘No, because I’m never going to be able to keep it off, so I’d be lying to everyone.’ I’m a normal girl. I struggled with my weight my whole life. It’s never been a secret.”
She also admitted to a history of self-harm, saying, “I do have my insecurities, it’s no secret. I’ve had a history with self-harm. I’ve been through lots of things in my life and it doesn’t matter how powerful people might see you to be. I do look in the mirror and think, ‘Oh, I don’t want to go to that party.’ But that’s the negative person in your head – like the devil and the angel – then the angel says, ‘No girl, walk in the room and just be yourself.’ My mum always said just be yourself. Every woman needs to feel good about themselves.”
Mother’s Influence and Showbiz Start
Collins credits her mother Joan as the “real driving force” in her family, recalling sacrifices such as walking to Romford instead of taking the bus and making a chicken last three days. Joan encouraged her daughter to enter showbiz after TOWIE producers approached Collins at the car showroom where she worked. “It was partly my mum’s dream for me to become famous,” Collins said. “I felt the dedication my mum had put in, I owed it to her. I thought, ‘I’ve got nothing to lose.’ If you don’t take a risk in life, nothing’s going to happen in your life.”
Reflecting on her achievements, Collins recalled meeting King Charles and Queen Camilla at a royal ball. “I had a great chat with the King and Queen,” she said. “It was another one of them OMFG moments. I thought, ‘How have I landed here?’ It was bizarre.”
Despite her fame, Collins values her home life away from the spotlight. “I realise what I do in show business is a business,” she said. “When I go home, put my key in the door, my two dogs run up to me and my mum says, ‘Make me a cup of tea’, or I’m loading the dishwasher. I love family life. I live in the country. I’ve always been very country. I’ve got chickens and I give the eggs to anyone that comes to the house. I cannot believe I actually live there. It’s fantastic. I can’t believe I managed to get here in life.”
