Sleepovers, solo shopping trips and hanging out with mates – these are the everyday moments that make British children feel like they're growing up, according to new research. The study, commissioned by TUI and backed by television personality and mother Josie Gibson, reveals that trust and confidence from parents are key to fostering a sense of independence in kids.
Childhood Independence Index Findings
The UK's inaugural Childhood Independence Index, released today, shows that over four in 10 children (41%) feel independent when trusted by their parents, while 36% link independence with self-confidence. The Index is based on a survey of 1,000 UK parents and 1,000 children aged 10 to 15, delving into the childhood experiences that make youngsters feel truly grown-up, the ages at which they believe they should first be entrusted with these milestones, and how these moments affect parents emotionally.
Rather than one pivotal event, the research suggests that growing up is a process built on numerous small firsts – from making your own purchases and walking to school, to spending pocket money or having your first sleepover at a friend's house. For parents, this shift often comes in a single, emotional moment when they realise their child doesn't need them quite as much anymore.
Josie Gibson's Focus Group
To delve deeper into the topic, Josie teamed up with TUI to host an animated focus group with children aged four to eight, asking what makes them feel like "big kids" and what they're eager to do independently. The children's responses closely reflected the survey findings, with trust appearing as the common theme running through both research studies.
Listening to the children's stories, Josie, who has a seven-year-old son Reggie, was "left in stitches." "They all had completely different ideas about what made them feel grown up," said the 41-year-old This Morning presenter. "Some were excited about ordering their own food, others just loved being trusted to do things on their own, and one savvy seven-year-old was already talking about investing in Premium Bonds. I thought, blimey – good on him! It was hilarious, but underneath it, they were all saying the same thing – they just want to be trusted and given a little more independence."
Age Milestones for Independence
The Childhood Independence Index also evaluated some of childhood's most significant milestones, questioning older children about when they believed youngsters should first be entrusted with each achievement. Walking around a holiday resort alone emerged as the earliest milestone, with children saying they feel ready from around the age of seven. Staying at a friend's house followed at age eight, while staying out later with friends came at nine. Ten proved to be something of a landmark age, with children saying they felt ready to travel short distances alone, walk to school, go into a shop by themselves, spend their own pocket money and own a first mobile phone.
Parental Emotions and Holidays
Like Josie, many parents described childhood independence as a mixture of pride, excitement and sadness. One parent said they realised their child was growing up "when they no longer wanted to hold my hand," while another recalled the day their daughter "walked into school without turning back to wave." For many parents, letting go isn't always easy – but holidays appear to make it feel a little easier. Almost six in 10 parents (58%) said they feel more comfortable giving children greater independence while away, while more than three quarters (77%) admitted relaxing everyday rules on holiday, with bedtimes, spending money and screen time among the first boundaries to soften. Meanwhile, almost two thirds (63%) of children said they feel more independent on holiday, with many saying travelling gives them more opportunities to try new things, make their own decisions and take on new responsibilities.
TUI's My Holiday Firsts Passport
To celebrate those milestone moments, TUI has launched its My Holiday Firsts Passport, available in selected stores while stocks last, encouraging children to record every holiday first – from trying new foods and making new friends to taking on exciting new adventures.
