A teacher with over two decades of experience is grappling with redundancy and a crisis of identity, questioning whether repeated workplace issues are her own fault. The educator, who had enjoyed steady promotions and a fulfilling career, was recently made redundant due to restructuring, leaving her feeling lost and confused.
A Sudden Change in Career Path
The teacher, who has been in the profession for more than 20 years, had a linear career progression for the first 15 years, with promotions every couple of years. However, the past five years have been fraught with difficulties. She left one school after the headteacher failed to support her following her mother's death, and another after whistleblowing on a senior leader for bullying. Now, she worries that these issues stem from her own behaviour, wondering if she is somehow seeking out conflict.
The Impact of Grief and Workplace Dynamics
Psychotherapist Mark Vahrmeyer suggests that the loss of her mother may have reactivated deeper feelings of being left alone with grief, making institutional failures feel more intense. He notes that conscientious people often doubt themselves in poorly led institutions, and that work can become a stage for replaying old relational patterns with authority figures who fail or structures that don't protect. The teacher's anger may be turning into self-doubt.
Fusing Work and Identity
For many, work and identity are closely intertwined. Vahrmeyer points out that work may have been a place where the teacher secured worth and warded off uncertainty. Now, with redundancy, she has lost a version of herself, leading to confusion. He asks what the redundancy has injured most: income or routine? And what feels most unbearable: being without work, a plan, or a clear sense of self?
Looking Ahead
Despite the challenges, the teacher has a rich life outside work, with a partner, three children, and strong friendships. This support system can help stabilise her during this period. Vahrmeyer encourages her to sit with the confusion and listen to her inner voice about the next steps. Leaving teaching may feel like a betrayal, but such periods can lead to enormous growth. The key is to recognise that the workplace issues were not her fault, but rather a reflection of unsupportive environments.
Every week, Annalisa Barbieri addresses personal problems sent in by readers. If you would like advice, please send your problem to ask.annalisa@theguardian.com. The latest series of Annalisa's podcast is available online.
