A woman who has long fantasised about attending a sex party and being with horny strangers is asking whether she should buy tickets for herself and her new boyfriend before Christmas. She found a "posh sex party" online but is unsure if she should be bold and make her dreams come true.
Talk Before You Spend
Agony aunt Jane O'Gorman advises her to talk to her new boyfriend before spending any money. "Has he ever expressed an interest in group sex? Might your juicy tickets freak him out?" Jane says to be honest and tell him about wanting to push back the boundaries, and ask if he is interested in joining in.
Check the Party's Legitimacy
Jane also warns to check out the party itself. "Is it legitimate? Is it a con?" She notes that spending a lot of money on tickets could lead to disappointment, with no guarantees of a satisfying time. She says it's fine for an adult to get involved in group sex, but urges research, finding like-minded people, and finding a comfort zone. She stresses personal safety and always practising safe sex by insisting on condoms.
Other Readers' Problems
In another letter, a woman feels sorry for her sister, whose husband of 15 years still demands sex every night, with sessions lasting at least two hours, despite her long working hours. Jane advises the sister to be careful about taking sides and to encourage her sister to level with her husband away from the bedroom, explaining she no longer enjoys their regular sex life and that a new way forward needs to be found, whether that involves a sex contract or separate beds. Jane also suggests the sister could speak to her GP and that only she can decide whether she stays or goes.
A third reader is flattered but confused after a friend's girlfriend offered sex during a party and has been sending X-rated texts since. Jane advises making it clear she's not interested and insisting she be left alone, as she could be testing or making trouble. She says telling the mate is up to the reader, who should not allow herself to be compromised or embarrassed, and suggests steering clear of this person in future.
