Former Blue Peter presenter Janet Ellis has revealed she is open to finding love again nearly five years after the death of her beloved husband, television producer John Leach, admitting she misses the simple joy of having someone to share everyday life with.
Open to Love Again
The broadcaster, 70, lost John in 2021 after he was diagnosed with secondary lung cancer but says the love they shared has left her open to finding companionship again, while making clear nobody could ever replace him.
‘I had a really good teacher in John that two is good, two is great,’ she tells The Mirror. ’Somebody who sees you, who makes you laugh, wants to do things with you, but also wants to do nothing with you.
‘I haven’t dated anyone for a long time and my dating habits are probably rooted in somebody in their late twenties when I had a slightly different agenda, so I love the idea of someone alongside me, but I don’t know how I get there.’
She joked that if she has any admirers, ‘they’re keeping themselves very quiet’, before adding: ‘If you’ve been really loved then you are porous and you are available for that because love is huge.
‘I will always love John and if anyone ever comes into my life, then he’s not replaceable. But it’s a nice idea that there might be someone to do the really tiny stuff.
‘I am lucky that I have good friends and family close by, but with a partner you have such a lovely spontaneity in the day-to-day. Let’s go to the farmers’ market and all those kind of things. There are a few things I’ve done on my own where I’ve just thought, ‘No, I don’t enjoy this in the way that I should. I’d really like to bring someone.’
Backing a New Guide for Cancer Carers
Having lost the love of her life to cancer, Ellis is helping to promote a book called 15 Things, written by her friend Paul Evans after his wife, film producer Melanie Dicks, was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. The book charts those things he wish he’d known beforehand.
‘As soon as I read the book I thought it needed to be everywhere, its free, its available in the waiting room at the oncologist and supported by Macmillan.
“It includes everything from avoiding too much information, sometimes oncologist will tell you something about your prognosis that you may not want to hear. How you break the news to people and having to navigate the whole cancer journey really.’
John’s Diagnosis and Final Days
John’s illness came as a devastating shock to the family. Ellis recalled how his symptoms initially appeared to be nothing more than a persistent sore throat while he was covering the Paralympics, before doctors discovered head and neck cancer.
‘John’s diagnosis came out of the blue really,’ she said. ‘He’d had a sore throat, but nothing felt very terrible. He was still working, covering the Paralympics here and Rio, saying, “My throat feels a bit dry”, but there was air conditioning.
‘By the time he got back from Rio it had been going on for quite a while. He popped down to the doctors, who gave him antibiotics and said if they didn’t work to come straight back. That’s when it began.’
Following radiotherapy, the couple believed they had reason to be optimistic. ‘We were told there was an excellent chance it had gone away. Things were going well and we’d just got back from a lovely holiday in Japan which was very active.
‘We went for what we thought was a routine check-up and that’s when they said it looked like secondary lung cancer. It was deeply, deeply shocking.’
John approached his terminal diagnosis with remarkable practicality, Ellis said, ensuring his family were prepared for what lay ahead.
‘Apart from being my best person, John was very practical and straightforward, and he never wanted to hide his illness from anyone. He guided us so well with dealing with his illness.
‘Once someone gets a secondary diagnosis, that means there’s treatment, but no cure.’
Although they both understood where the illness might lead, there was one conversation they never had.
‘John and I both felt this sense that we knew how this might end and it meant he could get his affairs in order. But we never talked about my life without him. That was a subject that was shut down. He’d just say, “I am here,” if I ever started to go down that route.’
Living with Grief
Ellis admitted she still struggles with his absence and says she has never felt guilty for grieving openly. ‘I don’t feel guilty when I cry because I loved him very much and nothing will take away the pain of his absence, nothing.
‘There are things all the time that remind me of him or of us and make me think we were denied the future that we thought we might have. Even when John was ill, I still couldn’t imagine him not being in the world.’
She believes people often struggle to know how to support someone living with grief, offering one piece of advice. ‘Don’t say, “Is there anything I can do?” Just say, “Can I do anything now?” The tiny bits of admin can wear us down.’
Family Life and Grandson Sonny
Despite losing her husband, Ellis has found comfort in family life. Her grandson Sonny now lives with her after daughter Sophie Ellis-Bextor, 47, suggested the arrangement.
‘After John died, I realised I don’t want to be the only one turning the lights on and off. I like the energy of someone else in the house.
‘Luckily that worked out well. His family home is only 10 minutes down the road, so he can pop between the two and I realise that’s a lucky situation to have.’
She could hardly be prouder of daughter Sophie, whose career has enjoyed an extraordinary resurgence after Murder on the Dancefloor featured prominently in the hit film Saltburn which came out in 2023.
‘My daughter Sophie has got great energy and enthusiasm. She throws herself into life wholeheartedly. She’ll always have a go.
‘As a family, we’ve always believed that you can have a go at something, but you don’t have to be the best, you don’t have to win or do it forever.’
She added: ‘Her stamina is amazing with five children, and her career is now international. Saltburn opened up success for her in America, which was a market she’d never attempted because you can lose your heart and your bank balance trying to do that. But it was lovely that the invitation came to her from across the pond.’
Reflections on Blue Peter and Life in London
Reflecting on her own career, Ellis said she feels nostalgic for her years presenting Blue Peter without believing the past was somehow better.
‘I am always aware of not being an older person saying to a 21-year-old, “Oh it was different in my day,” because it’s not nice to make them feel their world is not worth being in.
‘When I was on Blue Peter there was only one other channel. It was very, very different, but that isn’t to undermine the new generation coming through.’
She laughed at the programme’s wholesome image, adding: ‘Blue Peter was known for being squeaky clean, but I’m not saying I was squeaky clean. Let’s just say I’m glad there wasn’t the paparazzi and social media.’
Away from television, Ellis says she could never imagine swapping London for the countryside. ‘I love walking by the Thames with my dog. I’ve lived in London a long time and I honestly never get sick of it.
‘I like people and things. I like options. I like pavements and street lighting and public transport. I am too greedy to confine my life to one field.’
She also confessed she remains a lifelong ‘catastrophist’, admitting her mind immediately jumps to the worst-case scenario whenever her children fail to answer the phone.
‘If my kids are ever late calling me back, I’ve definitely got them wiped off the planet. John was always the person who’d say, “Don’t be ridiculous, they’re fine.”
‘So I try to hear his voice and the best thing whenever I was really worried about anything, he’d often say, “Come on, it’s irrelevant,” which is a really useful way of looking at things.’
