Tokyo Dating Agency Matches Couples with Same Surname to Skirt Japan's Ban
In a novel approach to a long-standing social issue, a Tokyo dating agency has launched a series of matchmaking events designed to circumvent Japan's controversial ban on married couples having separate surnames. The inaugural event brought together three men and three women, all sharing the surname Suzuki, for an evening of conversation and connection.
Event Details and Participant Experiences
Held at a venue in Tokyo on a Friday evening, the event paired participants in booths for 15-minute intervals, encouraging them to get to know each other using only their first names. The emcee kicked off the proceedings with a cheerful "hello" and a reminder to smile, setting a relaxed tone. After verifying identities via an app, the participants engaged in lively chatter over beer, with laughter echoing from some tables as they moved between rounds.
Sponsor companies with the Suzuki name provided cakes and biscuits, adding a playful touch. Similar events are planned for other common Japanese surnames, including Ito, Tanaka, and Sato. Hana Suzuki, a 34-year-old nurse, shared her thoughts: "To be honest, I'm not too fussed about keeping my maiden name, but I thought it would be fun to meet another Suzuki."
Background on Japan's Surname Law
Japan's civil code, established in the late 1800s, mandates that married couples must share the same family name. While couples can choose which surname to adopt, statistics show that in nearly 95% of cases, women change their names, highlighting gender disparities in a male-dominated society. Many women use their birth names professionally while adhering to their legal married surnames in official documents, creating confusion.
Japan remains the only country globally with such a requirement, drawing criticism from international bodies like the UN committee on the elimination of discrimination against women, which has urged reform. Businesses, including the powerful Keidanren lobby, argue that the rule hampers female employees in international contexts, where mismatched IDs can cause issues. An internal Keidanren survey found 82% of female executives support allowing separate surnames.
Organiser's Perspective and Public Sentiment
Yuka Maruyama, a creative planner and project initiator at Asuniwa, explained the motivation behind the events: "We launched the project to highlight a growing issue in Japan, as many people hesitate to marry because of the requirement to change their surname. We wanted to present a simple and slightly humorous idea – matching people who already share the same surname – in order to make this issue more visible and easier to understand."
A survey of 2,500 users of the Japanese dating app Pairs revealed that 36.6% of women and 46.6% of men are reluctant to change their surnames, with over 7% stating they would end a relationship if neither partner wanted to alter their name. This reflects broader societal tensions, as conservative politicians, including Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi, resist changes, citing concerns about undermining traditional family units and causing confusion for children.
Participant Reflections and Future Implications
Taisho Suzuki, a 33-year-old company employee, noted, "I've been to matchmaking parties before, but I thought this one would be more interesting. I hadn't given much thought to the idea of marrying another Suzuki, but I can see now why it's a safe option. I don't want to give up my surname when I marry, and I know a lot of women feel the same about their names."
Participants used their shared surname as an icebreaker, sharing anecdotes about the challenges of having a common name in public settings. While the organisers do not follow up with couples for privacy reasons, the event has sparked conversations about potential compromises, such as selective dual-surname systems. As Japan grapples with this issue, initiatives like these aim to foster dialogue and challenge outdated norms in a rapidly evolving society.
