A woman in her 30s has asked for advice after witnessing her boyfriend's rude and impatient attitude towards his mother. She has been with him for nearly a year, has met his parents a couple of times, and is falling in love with him, but his behaviour has made her respect him less.
She noticed he calls his mother by her first name instead of "Mum", while he calls his dad "Dad". He is also curt and impatient when she asks him questions. When she asked if they had a difficult relationship, he replied: "I don't want to get into it right now, but she's a tricky person." The mother seemed very nice and lovely to her, which left the woman confused and concerned.
Coleen's advice: Don't run a mile yet
Coleen advises the woman to "put the brakes on" and not be dramatic or unfair by running away before knowing the full story. She points out that the mother being polite to her doesn't mean she hasn't caused problems in her relationship with her son.
Coleen suggests the partner may not be ready to talk about what has happened between them, and the woman should find out when he is ready instead of making up her mind without facts. She also notes he might have been nervous or on edge when meeting his parents, possibly because his mother wasn't nice to a previous girlfriend or caused problems in a past relationship, or it could be something just between them.
Communication is key
Coleen stresses that communication is important in a relationship. If he doesn't open up about his feelings and can't talk to her about things, that would be the red flag going forward.
