The 'taxi cab' theory, first introduced in Sex and the City, has resurfaced online, sparking debate about whether men truly commit suddenly when they decide they are ready. The theory, explained by Miranda in season three, compares men to cabs: when their light is on, they are available and ready to settle down with whoever happens to be next.
What Is the Taxi Cab Theory?
Miranda tells Charlotte that men wake up one day and decide they are ready for marriage and children, then turn their light on. The next woman they meet becomes their wife. This idea has persisted for decades, especially among single women in their thirties. Recently, a Substack piece argued that Harry Styles's alleged engagement to Zoe Kravitz proves the theory, suggesting that timing is key.
Why Do Men Suddenly Commit?
According to Olivia Victoria, an LA-based influencer, women often make themselves ready for Mr Right due to biological constraints, while men can wait until they feel ready. Men may reach a point where casual dating becomes boring, as Ryan, 41, explains: 'You look around and see your friends have moved forward, started lives, and their joy comes from somewhere else.'
Dating coach Mila Smith observes that many male clients eventually hit a turning point after experiencing heartbreak or rejection. One client, Sam, was commitment-phobic until a new partner treated him the way he had treated his ex. This shock made him realise what he had done and changed his view on commitment. 'His light is definitely on,' Smith says.
Is It Really That Simple?
Dan Somers, CEO of MANUP?, a men's mental health charity, believes the theory oversimplifies men. 'Most men would love to settle down, but they feel disposable due to modern dating dynamics,' he says. Social media often portrays women as victims and men as villains, creating pressure. Somers himself was anti-marriage until he got older and saw it as something grounded rather than restrictive.
Ultimately, maturity plays a role. As people age, commitment becomes more appealing. Ryan concludes: 'It's all part of growing up; some just take longer.' The taxi cab theory may have truth, but internal journeys are often longer than they appear.
