Amanda Barnes, 49, who has incurable breast cancer, organised a solo wedding because she did not want to die without experiencing being a bride. The company director from Totnes, Devon, wore her dream wedding dress at a celebration with 30 of her closest loved ones, despite the absence of a groom.
Amanda discovered a lump the size of two grapes beneath her left arm in October 2021 and was diagnosed with stage three breast cancer in July 2022. She had always dreamed of marriage but remained single. Her friends helped her find the perfect gown, and on August 16 she had her hair and makeup done before enjoying a Sunday roast at a hotel.
No groom 'didn't matter'
Amanda said: "There may not have been a groom and that didn't matter, because there was no shortage of love. And I wore the dress of my dreams. My family and friends pulled together to make something I'd always dreamed about actually happen. The love I've received has been overwhelming."
She added: "I just never found the right person, and sometimes you can't keep waiting for the perfect circumstances. Cancer has taken an enormous amount from me, but while I'm still able to make choices for myself, I don't want it to take away my ability to enjoy being alive."
The mum-of-two has since been told the cancer has spread to her brain, with doctors unable to predict how long she may have left. She has already surpassed her initial prognosis by three years. Over the past four years she has spent £700,000 on private treatments covered by her health insurance, having only received a few months' NHS care earlier this year.
Symptoms before diagnosis
Before her diagnosis, Amanda felt hot and cold and noticed swelling in her left breast. She visited her GP the following day and underwent an ultrasound at the beginning of November at Plymouth's Nuffield private hospital. The results returned normal, but Amanda remained unwell and exhausted, prompting another ultrasound in March 2022. Again, the results showed nothing unusual, but after a biopsy in June, Amanda received her breast cancer diagnosis a week later, in July.
She said: "It was a huge shock. I had no idea it was cancer, but I did feel like something was very wrong, because of the heat, the swelling, and the lump. All those tests coming back 'normal' made me feel like I was a hypochondriac, like I might be imagining all these things that were happening to me."
Following a PET scan at the Royal Marsden Hospital in Sutton, Surrey, in October 2022, she was informed the cancer had spread to her spine, making it stage four, and was warned she might not survive beyond March 2023. She said: "I just couldn't believe it. It was awful being given a date, and that date has stuck with me, but here I am."
Fantastic day
Amanda received radiotherapy for the tumours on her spine, which successfully helped to reduce them. Despite this, she continued pursuing her passions for hill walking and travelling, going on holiday up to six times a year, and devoted as much time as she could to her children Connor, 20, and Ruby, 17.
She undergoes PET scans every three months, and in March 2026 was told she required chemotherapy after the cancer had also spread to her femurs and hips. Amanda resolved to fulfil her dream of wearing a wedding dress in July 2026 and called her friend Jenny Hardy, 37. She discovered her perfect gown, featuring a fitted bodice and straight skirt with a long split, from Prudence Gowns in Plymouth. She dressed up and spent the day at Islington Country House hotel, near Newton Abbott, enjoying a Sunday roast and indulging in spa treatments.
Amanda said: "It was absolutely fantastic. I just wanted to fulfil one of my oldest and greatest dreams while I still could. My friends can't take away my diagnosis, but they do give me practical support, and most importantly, love, laughter and memories. I did it. I wore the most beautiful wedding dress and had a wonderful few hours full of love."
Friend Lucy has been posting about Amanda's special day on TikTok. Amanda said: "I'm so grateful to everyone who has shared my story. I certainly never thought millions of people would see me wearing that dress. I hope the extraordinary response to Lucy's video reminds somebody else not to keep putting life off while they're waiting for everything to be perfect."
After five rounds of chemotherapy at Torbay Hospital and two at a private clinic in London, Amanda was informed on 26 August that the cancer had spread to her brain. Amanda has now lost vision in her right eye due to cancer also affecting her eye. She is continuing with chemotherapy at a Harley Street clinic in London and has established a GoFundMe to help cover the costs of potential future treatments. "I'm just not ready to stop," she said.
