A mother has written to Coleen Nolan, feeling let down because her daughter's grandparents show little interest in being involved. The reader, who has a three-year-old daughter, says both sets of parents remember birthdays and send Christmas gifts, but never visit, leaving the couple to make all the trips.
First grandchild for both families
The daughter is the first grandchild for both families, so the parents assumed the grandparents would be over the moon and want to be as involved as possible. The lack of engagement has come as a surprise.
Both sets of parents still work either full or part-time, and have other interests and hobbies, including travel. The reader notes that all their friends' parents are much more supportive.
Coleen's advice
Coleen understands the situation from both sides, saying there is a lot of pressure on grandparents these days, especially those who are working. She points out that working grandparents may be exhausted and not instantly want to go into childcare duties.
She advises the reader not to bottle up feelings and get resentful. Instead, she suggests having a conversation with the grandparents, perhaps starting with a heart-to-heart with her mum. They might be unaware of how she feels, so talking to them could help.
Coleen is certain both sets of grandparents love the daughter to bits and would help if the family were really stuck.
